I was going to put this in the frustration thread but this is much more then a frustration. It's is also much more then a hate. Why is it more then a hate? Because is a flaw I posses and I fully recognize it as a problem and actively try and remedy it. Yet I have made no head way.
Out of every insult I have every heard, and I hear a lot, only one hurts. Often I take the "its only a word" stance, but its hypocritical when I do because I can be hurt with a word. Whats worse is its tossed around so lightly and yet when there is true intent behind it the phrase "Stalkerish" or "Creeper" cut so deep I have always been left speechless.
So I am single right now, and was just hanging out with my friend "P" and he introduced me to a few of his friends who are new. I talked with them all and had a good time. Well I meet one of them by chance a few days later and we sit and talk and mutually have a good time. Now she is a beautiful gal so I naturally flirt with her and she reciprocates. Fast foreword a 4 weeks I see her every now and again(work, tutoring, hanging out) So I decide to ask her out she declines due to pre-arranged plans, and I see her at my work two days later I once again. My friend say I should give it another shot, but I am shot down again.
So that's where I stop, she must not be interested, but then every time we do run into each other she is scared to look at me takes long ways around. So I at one point ask whats up and she is scared of me stalking her. I would love to tell her I'm not, I understand that she isn't interested but every time I get called a Stalker I just...well can't do anything and seize up.