BULLIES!

[chrono eric]

I remember, back in middle school, there were these two bullies named Nick Cavalieri and Steven Nye (pretty sure that's their names) that used to gang up on me and try to beat me up almost daily. Little hoodlum shits used to smoke what they claimed was crack behind the gym during PE. THIS WAS IN SIXTH GRADE MIND YOU. I was a scrawny little kid back then so I took the beatings for awhile. But then one day, I beat the living fuck out of both of them with a super soaker. Which is, I believe, the most awesome thing to use as a blunt weapon ever.

And they never picked on me again, heh. I disagree with the old adage - violence IS the answer.

[Zelbess]

It would have been pretty neat had you squirted them with the Supersoaker. Say, filled it with vinegar or a soap/water solution and got them right in the eyes.

[chrono eric]

No it was too spur of of the moment for that. Kids outside, supersoaker laying around - weapon acquired - smash down. Also I was probably too young to think of something like that.