What's the point of apologizing anyways?

[TriforceofEternity]

http://blog.penelopetrunk.com/2007/04/27/send-etiquette-for-apologizing-in-an-email/


Why is it when if you said/did something you later regret and you try to humbly apologize to the *victim*  he/she shoves you aside and doesn't take notice and later considers you still rude if you attempt to further make contact?

I've seen this on all sides/angles but mostly people who are higher ranked/positioned seem to push people who apologize aside as trash even though the actual infraction was small something like a 'Misdemeanor* as a 'civil offense' on a forum.

What does it mean?

Seriously people aren't perfect and we have our days and I certainly try my best to get out of those moments instead of screaming and ranting/name calling with all caps......................LIKE THIS!!!      Doesn't that hurt your eyes? 

[FaustWolf]

Well, consider first that electronic communication is as imperfect as any other -- and doubly so because you're not always sure the other person actually opened your email amongst the sea of spam that probably floods his or her inbox. If it's a forum, even a PM might be a better option (as opposed to email), but if the incident to apologize for occurred in physical proximity it probably demands a phone call or a face-to-face discussion.

[Radical_Dreamer]

You apologize because you recognize that your actions were wrong, and you seek to correct the problems caused and work to ensure that such wrong actions don't occur again. This is distinct from asking for forgiveness.

[TriforceofEternity]

Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm I always assumed Apologies & Forgivness always went with each other.

Every Time I apologize I hope to seek forgiveness as I assumed/thought an apologize is a formal plea for forgivness.

I once broke a small infraction on a forum similar to what would be in real life a *traffic fine* which is also a *misdeamnor* and I tried to apologize to the moderator that I am sorry for upseting him/her but the person never responded/replied so I resorted to pleading for forgivness which the person STILL didn't respond even a week later.

You dont' want to know what happend next but I tell you it wasn't pretty and I still feel broken for what happened..........................

[Lord J Esq]

Radical_Dreamer is correct: Making an apology is a genuine act of penitence. You're not supposed to get anything out of it other than a clearer conscience. If the offended party takes your show of contrition and rewards it with forgiveness, then it's a bonus.

Asking for forgiveness is the same as asking for a favor, except you're asking this favor of someone who you just wronged. Such requests, then, ought to be judicious.