End of the Dream by Seiya - a fanfic based on the end theme of Chrono Cross
It was like waking from a long dream. I was Kidd, but I was Schala. The terrible void of nothingness slowly faded away into my room. The cool breeze coming in my window a reminder that I was safe, I had been saved. But from what, the dream for a moment was so fuzzy, but faces and memories of another life kept intruding. I had just saved myself. From what though, it was all a dream right? After all, there was no way I could have done some of those things I had dreamed about. Lucca was still here, Lucca hadn't been taken away from me, I had seem her right before going to bed. Who was Schala, and who was Kidd? Another face appears, beautiful blue eyes, and a kind, caring face. I see him at once from two places, as myself, Kidd, and from trapped within something, Schala. That something scares me, but it is dead now. I am safe, I saved myself, and those caring, blue eyes.
But there is no way I could have done all of that, could I? But the dream was so real, almost like a memory from long ago....
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osanai te ni tsudsunda furueteru sono hikari wo
koko made tadotte kita jikan no fuchi wo samayoi
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A year has passed since that dream, I have forgetten some of it, but it still remains so strong. Today is an important day, for today was the day that our home was destroyed and Lucca was taken from me. Today was quiet, it was warm, and the night was quiet. I laid awake late into the night in terror, waiting for the flames to start, but nothing happened. Maybe it was a just a dream after all. But I still remember those eyes and that smile. He was so nice and warm, but his name has started to slip away, like the tide does, into the mists of time.
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sagashi tsudzukete kita namae sae shiranai keredo
tada hitotsu no omoi wo anata ni tewatashita kute
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That dream still haunts me even after all these years. The question of if it was really a dream or not is one that I always have been intrigued by. There has always been strange occurrences around, such as this strange jewel that Lucca has said was with me when she found me. It is a question, and to me proof that maybe that dream is something more then it appeared. I still haven't had the courage to ask Lucca about it. And as time goes on, more and more of it goes away.
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toki wa ai mo itami wo fukaku dakitome
keshite yuku kedo watashi ha oboeteiru
zutto...
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Today is the day for me, I have studied the world, looking for a place that matches my dream; and I have found none. I still remember clearly all those memories of Schala, but those of Kidd have slowly been going away. Today I will ask Lucca, about Schala. Why they are still so clear, I do not know, but I think Lucca does. She has started to look at me strangely these days, as though she knows something.
I look in the mirror and see a grown woman, but I am still haunted by that childish dream of a prince who saved me. I feel empty without those eyes looking at me. Is it possible I fall in love with that dream?
People have said that I have always been too mature for my age, too serious. Lucca has always said that people just don't understand me.
If she does know, then today I will find out, yes today, before I lose my nerve again.
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watashi no mune no oku ni itsu kara ka hibiiteita...
yotsuyu no shizuku yori mo kasuka na sasayaki da kedo
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I knock at her door, when I know she won't be working on an invention and still be alone.
"Yes? Enter."
"Lucca, can I ask you about something?"
There is a look of suprise and maybe fear, she knows what this is about.
"What is bothering you, Kidd?"
"Who was Schala?"
The look of surprise confirms what I have always thought, Schala was real, and Lucca knew her.
"Come in Kidd, and lock the door, this is going to take a bit of time, and I don't want to be bothered."
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itetsuku hoshi no yami he tsumugu inori ga
tooi anata no sora ni todoku you ni...
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"I see." So the dream was't just a dream, it was part of that previous time.
"I called you Kidd to hide your identity from people who might come looking for you. Your real name is Schala Zeal. I hope you can forgive me for never having told you."
"No, don't worry about that, I can understand. But, let me tell you a tale, of a woman named Schala, and what Lavos did."
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"I never imagined that is what happened to Scha..., I mean you after we destroyed Lavos."
"I am still not sure if I am Schala or Kidd. Really I think I am both. But that isn't important, there is more I want to talk to you about. I remembered all of this in a dream when I was a child, I thought it was just that though, a dream."
"So for so long you weren't sure of your own self, no wonder you always seems seemed so mature and yet so insecure."
"That isn't all of the dream though, there is more to it."
"I thought that couldn't be all, how did you get free then."
"Let me tell you the story of Kidd, and how Schala was freed...."
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"All you have told me makes me think that the rest of the dream in someway did happen too. I am not sure though as this is the year I met that young man and saved myself. I want to find him, I want to meet him again, and I want to live again!"
"Me, Crono, Marle, and the rest had some amazing adventures, but at one point Crono was killed saving us. But through Marle's love of him, and that pendant you are wearing, the same pendant she always wore, we brought him back from death. I am sure that you can do the same if you feel for this man so much. Just one question, what is that the name of the lucky man."
"You know, it is funny, I think I love him, but I can't even remember his name anymore."
"Well if what you said is true, those days never happened and the planet is trying to remove the last trace of it. Look what happened to the future I saw, it was outright destroyed, completely. But if you are serious about finding him, there is some money I have been saving for you, but I thought you would go looking for someone different. You should start with him anyways, he knows more about time and magic then any other person I know."
"Who is that?"
"Go looking for the leader of the Mystics, the man named Magus."
"But why would I want to go looking for him? I thought he caused the Great War"
"Because before he was Magus, he had another name, Janus. And he was only using the Mystics so he could get the power he needed to summon Lavos and try and help you."
And so I set out to find my younger brother, who was now probably older then me.
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Radical Dreamers - The Unstolen Gem
English translation by James "Seiya" Stephenson
A young hand covered the wavering flame, protecting it,
I followed its light to reach here, lighting my way through ingnorance.
I have continued to search for you for so long, but I don't even know your name.
I want to bring you the one memory I have.
Time takes away pain and love.
They are disappearing, but I remember.
Forever...
From sometime in the past it did pound in my heart,
Quieter then the almost silent whispering of the morning dew.
I pray to the stars in cold dark night,
To reach that far away place, where I can find you.
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And finally I arrived here, under this cuerullean sky, on this beach.
Here is the start of the dream, here I will find you.
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FIN
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