So I didn't get to play at all yesterday. I got home from work pretty late and the power at the house was off. We're having bad ice storms where we're at, so we were without power until this morning. Temperatures are below freezing, so it made for a very chilly night!
It makes me re-think that hey maybe everything's alright in this world and there are still good ppl left. You're a really grounded, down-to-earth dude it's no surprise you've got your life together already and you're just a family man now.
I think there's a lot more of us than we realize, it's just hard finding each other. That's why I love little corners of the internet like this one. I have found that the best online communities are small and somewhat isolated. I've got a few little communities I participate in, but namely it's here at the Compendium and there a Discord for an author/Youtuber I watch who calls himself
Softypapa. I got really into him in the early days of Youtube when he would hike in the mountain of Japan and explore old, abandoned tea farms. He eventually moved back to the United States and has spent a lot of time exploring the deserts of California and he talks a lot about living a good life (and he even wrote a book about it). These are my main two online communities that enrich my life rather than take away from it. I feel energy spent in these communities is energy well spent.
As for having my life together... Only by necessity and luck. I got lucky in that I married a girl I met in college (I saw you ask about that later in the post). We actually dated my sophomore year / her freshman year of college but it didn't really work out. We reconnected a few years later and both had grown a lot, so we gave it another shot and we were much more successful that time around.
I think we've both pushed each other a lot in good ways, so I'm grateful for that aspect of the relationship. If not for her, I probably wouldn't be here. I would have zero aspirations and since I struggle with chronic depression (and I'm in a much better place now), she helps keep me present and in the moment before I descend too far down. I was seriously in a dark place about ten years ago, and I probably wouldn't have made it had I not had her and my kids as lampposts to keep me focused on the big picture. Even though I hate being a cog in the corporate world (I want more meaning in life and wish I was doing something that made more of a difference in the world), I am very grateful for the opportunities I've had and the support structure I've been able to build for myself.
I've never really been that interested in American culture: politics, sports, news. That tri-fecta / or, trinity I have absolutely NO, ZERO interest in,-at. all. I never see anyone like me on T.V. ever anyways growing up so it was hard to relate to the country and its people. I never had any real heroes or ppl to look up to growing up cause I never saw my own face anywhere.
I will say -- Asian representation is a huge problem in the United States. There's very little Asian presence in politics, television, movies, sports, etc. It's just as you said, unfortunately. When you're not represented, I can see how it can be culturally demoralizing. I'm not even Asian and I can see it. There's a lot of focus on African American and now LGBTQ+, but there's been next to so attention or effort to stand up more Asian Americans as pillars of our communities and culture. It makes zero sense to me.
So yeah all the promises America had for the immigrant "The American Dream," "land of milk and honey," "if you can make it in Detroit you can make it anywhere." It's not really all it's cracked up to be. Sometimes I feel people just don't have connections anywhere else outside of the country and they're pretty much stuck there grown adults with no passport. It's just out of the question moving or traveling to other parts of the world. I just found a lot of people I've interacted w/ very sheltered and they just kinda see what's around the corner at the house, and that's it for their daily adventure? Just staying at the house. Not really looking at applications for new friendships.
America has two huge problems regarding travel, not to mention the American Dream.
First, we're a geographically MASSIVE country. It's very hard for an American to travel to another country from a logistics perspective, so we don't get that exposure to other cultures that we so desperately need. Because we're so geographically large, the logistics just aren't there to accommodate travel, and we sure as heck don't have a good transportation system (ie high speed trains) that can even easily facilitate inner-national travel, let alone international travel. The only countries we border are Mexico and Canada (and the Caribbean islands are nearby), but that's it. It's not like Europe or even some parts of Asia where you can just catch a cheap flight or train ride and head to another country for a day or two. As a result, many Americans just aren't aware of the true larger landscape of the world. If you've never left your small town, state, or country, your worldview is likely going to be somewhat limited on that larger world-community scale. The internet is all many Americans have, and quite frankly, it's not enough. Real experience and real exposure is so necessary to build respect and a healthy worldview, but it's really difficult for Americans to get that.
Second, there's the financial aspect. Everything is so damned expensive nowadays. It goes hand-in-hand with the logistics problem, but the costs of travel are also pretty wild. Moving, visiting another state (let alone another country) are insane. The costs of living keep raising and inflation is pushing up the prices of, well, everything. Right now, so many Americans can hardly put a roof over their head, let alone have disposable income that can permit travel and leisure.
For example: I make six figures in USD and we live almost entirely paycheck to paycheck. We drive two old cars (one is 12 years old, the other is 20 years old), we have a hefty mortgage and some land (for farming), and we have next to nothing leftover for vacations or large purchases (such as much-needed house repairs). And we have it good! An example of these needed repairs or house enhancements: we need to run electricity to the barn we built. The barn itself was $30k, and just to run and install electricity is another $5k+. We don't have that kind of money lying around, so we save and scrounge and I'm try to save up so we can finally put in the electricity. Once again, that's such a first world problem and I have it better than most. I am able to make ends meet, but then again, with what I'm bringing home, I should be having TONS of leftover money that, quite frankly, we don't.
I do believe that twenty years ago things were different. I think there was a time that the American Dream was much more tangible, especially in the first few decades after WWII. Sure there were other cultural problems (racism and there were a lot of cultural gaps that were extremely problematic), but financial stability was at least more tangible. All one needed was a high school diploma and could have a house, two cars, and you could even survive on one income. None of that is realistic now.
I legit blame a lot of it on de-regulation and "Reaganomics." Since the 1980s, the quality of life for the middle and lower class has gone down considerable, while money is being pushed to and hoarded at the top. We should not have a society where people cannot afford healthcare while billionaires have pissing contest hobbies about being the first to space. Fuck this version of the system that is failing so many people. And I don't think this is just an American problem, but we're leading the pack.
I obviously have really strong opinions. Food, healthcare, personal freedoms... all of these should be attainable to all. Period. I don't really subscribe to Republican or Democrat political ideologies (because both parties are systemic in holding down the populace), but I do lean liberal and with more humanist approaches to societal problems.
To tie all this back together, I feel it's even harder for minorities to attain the same chances that a man of anglo descent would receive. Not to mention that women aren't even afforded the same chance as a man (at least some of the time). It's just such an unfair, rigged system, and it happens all over the world. There's generally always a power dynamic with majority and minority (look at the Uighur Muslim crisis over in China right now).
Your experiences growing up in the US were very unfortunate. There are so many minorities that have had the same type of experience. Sure, their experiences were unique and different, but the fundamental struggles are the same. It's a damn shame, and it's not just limited to minorities in the US.
What's it like for minorities in the Philippines? Are they afforded the same experiences that native Filipino are? Is there racism against those with darker complexions or of African descent? Just curious.
My thought is -- I can't change the systematic issues. But I damn well can be an agent of change to EVERY SINGLE PERSON I MEET. We gotta lift each other up, because even if we're different, the core fundamentals are the same. We all feel pain, and love, and have hopes and desires.
