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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode 1 - Part 1 January 2014 update
« on: November 17, 2014, 07:57:58 am »
i get a 404 error when i try to open that pdf. it's a shame because awhile ago i read everything up until this thread and i'm a huge fan. can anybody help me out?
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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode I - Chapters 10 - 13
« on: November 11, 2012, 11:31:27 pm »
For sure; her actions have the same air of mischievousness and tomboyishness that characterizes her in the game -- and, on the other side of the coin, she demonstrates a sense of herself and her place in the world which she takes seriously. The game does not accentuate this latter characteristic as often, admittedly, but your portrayal of her (and her motivation/background) feels perfectly fitting. It was definitely a favorite part of mine, getting to know Marle. I think you add complexity to many aspects of the story in this same fashion -- which is a way of saying you take liberties, because you pretty much have to, obviously -- and it's always been to positive and natural effect imo.
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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode I - Chapters 10 - 13
« on: October 06, 2012, 03:36:32 am »
Finished chapter 13! I greatly enjoyed every moment reading this. Eagerly awaiting more.
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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode I - Chapters 10 - 13
« on: September 29, 2012, 03:20:22 am »
Okay, just finished chapter 11. Such a good payoff! The escape from Manoria and the underground ruins was exciting and climactic. Even so, the chapter ends on a small cliffhanger, which is to say that you do a great job of manipulating and controlling the tension, decreasing it gradually rather than letting us feel relief right away.
While reading this, it dawned on me that Crono's earlier cockiness is indeed justified. After all, at that point he's young and yet unhumbled; the events he'd so far faced were hardly grueling compared to what came in Manoria. That my mind was changed on that matter is a testament to how much I felt the action, too.
While reading this, it dawned on me that Crono's earlier cockiness is indeed justified. After all, at that point he's young and yet unhumbled; the events he'd so far faced were hardly grueling compared to what came in Manoria. That my mind was changed on that matter is a testament to how much I felt the action, too.
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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode I Chapters 6 - 9 + new chapter 3
« on: September 23, 2012, 02:07:35 am »
Goddamn, chapter 9 was so good. I love Crono's doubting Frog at first, and the characterization of each of them that such a scene allows. As I anticipate each event and then subsequently see it played out, I notice that you never make lazy work of anything. Instead of letting things happen simply, each narrative turn is an opportunity taken to add detail and meaning. To which I say bravo.
I may've been overcritical last post; certainly a romantic gesture wouldn't be ill-fitting at that point. My complaint wasn't that big a deal, and I could see it working as is. I just thought I'd mention it, however slight.
I may've been overcritical last post; certainly a romantic gesture wouldn't be ill-fitting at that point. My complaint wasn't that big a deal, and I could see it working as is. I just thought I'd mention it, however slight.
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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode I Chapters 6 - 9 + new chapter 3
« on: September 19, 2012, 06:57:10 pm »
Just some general thoughts, as I haven't given any yet:
I love the way the world of the game has been "stretched out," that is, given more detail, in ways that just completely make sense. Watching Crono and Marle during the Millenial Fair was an absolute joy to read. Also anything with Lucca. Lucca's my favorite here. Her nerdiness and subtle tomboyism is portrayed very well. In any case, all of the characters have been brought to life in a new way for me really exceptionally. I've done some small excited squealing of my own, especially imagining the possibility of many more chapters. Another example of things fitting is, as mentioned above, Yakra and his motives. The outlining of his motivations gives the world ever more life, and helps it to stand up as a quality narrative on its own terms.
The only thing I question is some of Crono and Marle's interactions upon meeting again in Queen Leene's bedroom in 600 A.D. Crono seems too ready to flirt here, whereas my favorite part of that moment in the video game is that Marle appreciated him for, like, treating her as a person, and not admiring her too readily (whether as the Princess Nadia or as an object of desire). He was appreciated for being a kind person, in other words. Granted, Crono was a silent protagonist, but it felt real to me. Here, Crono's tenderness seems a bit too forward and therefore hollow. His pulling her close and telling her the Millenial Fair was real was simply too corny a gesture. It was the first time their interactions didn't feel perfect. I'm not sure at this point if I would prefer a rewrite of the scene or just that line, but there you go. I hope it helps.
I love the way the world of the game has been "stretched out," that is, given more detail, in ways that just completely make sense. Watching Crono and Marle during the Millenial Fair was an absolute joy to read. Also anything with Lucca. Lucca's my favorite here. Her nerdiness and subtle tomboyism is portrayed very well. In any case, all of the characters have been brought to life in a new way for me really exceptionally. I've done some small excited squealing of my own, especially imagining the possibility of many more chapters. Another example of things fitting is, as mentioned above, Yakra and his motives. The outlining of his motivations gives the world ever more life, and helps it to stand up as a quality narrative on its own terms.
The only thing I question is some of Crono and Marle's interactions upon meeting again in Queen Leene's bedroom in 600 A.D. Crono seems too ready to flirt here, whereas my favorite part of that moment in the video game is that Marle appreciated him for, like, treating her as a person, and not admiring her too readily (whether as the Princess Nadia or as an object of desire). He was appreciated for being a kind person, in other words. Granted, Crono was a silent protagonist, but it felt real to me. Here, Crono's tenderness seems a bit too forward and therefore hollow. His pulling her close and telling her the Millenial Fair was real was simply too corny a gesture. It was the first time their interactions didn't feel perfect. I'm not sure at this point if I would prefer a rewrite of the scene or just that line, but there you go. I hope it helps.
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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode I Chapters 6 - 9 + new chapter 3
« on: September 16, 2012, 01:23:07 pm »
In Chapter 6, "thee" is often used in the subject position of a phrase. However, the correct usage is that "thou" is subject and "thee" object. A work of fiction isn't forced to abide by history 100%, but "thee" in the subject position just sounds completely inelegant to me.
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Fan Fiction / Re: Chrono Trigger: Episode I Chapters 6 - 9 + new chapter 3
« on: September 15, 2012, 12:18:34 am »
Ahh, for some reason the links to attachments are no longer working anywhere! I get a big mess of text.
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Dream Splash III - Chrono Break [2010] / Re: "Project Unity" - Chrono Trigger: Episode I Chapters 1 - 4
« on: September 10, 2012, 01:46:08 am »
Hey, I registered just so I could read this! I don't often read fanfics, but I just finished Chrono Trigger a second or third time (before that, CC for the first time) and I'm not ready to leave that universe just yet. So I gave this a shot, and the first chapter hooked me immediately. I've just now finished the second. You don't know what this is doing for me. I could give any amount of critique (not a great deal, as the writing is very very good), but for now it'll suffice for me to tell you how much you've engaged my imagination. It's a whole lot. Loving it to death, and I look forward to reading the rest, however much there may be.
edit: I was led to the chapters 6-9 thread by scrolling through the news page, btw.
edit: I was led to the chapters 6-9 thread by scrolling through the news page, btw.
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